The Things Kids Say.... (May 2013 - Dec 2014)

Starting with the most recent.

• We took MARTA to the airport early in the morning.  While we were sitting on the train Matthias looked at me with this huge cheesy grin and told me he was happy.  He then looked across the way and then back and me and said "other people are really sad, mom."  I told him that they may not be sad, but are probably tired. He replied with "they should take a big nap."  So true.
• I was reviewing the names of Aunts and Uncles with Matthias and asked him if her remembered Uncle Paul.  His eyes got big and he said "he is so bigger."
• The kids wanted to help clean up today.  They LOVE it and are getting pretty good (especially for their age).  Today Matthias swept the floor while Lizzy tried to mop (at the same time).  Awesome!
• I made the kids oatmeal today and then made toast to go with it.  When I gave Matthias his toast he said, "Hot dog, I loves toast."
• Lizzy: I'm not yelling, I just raised my voice.
• Matthias: I sing like lightning and thunder, fast and strong
• Lizzy: I like Dr. Zeus.
• After learning that one tool is called needle-nose pliers, Lizzy commented in a nervous voice, "they are for your nose?!?!"
• Lizzy: if you want to be a Princess, then you have to put the fan in your face.
• Matthias: mom, I'm thinking about what if the police had a pet cheetah and they put a police hat on him and drove an old fashioned police car? Lizzy: what if the police had pixie dust on their car and they went faster until they started to fly.
• Matthias: when I'm a grown up I will always buy whipped cream and dump it in my mouth.
• Lizzy (while helping me stir pancake mix): I will do the honors.
• Lizzy: I have a baby in my tummy. Matthias: no, if you had a baby in your tummy, you’d have big private parts.
• Me: where are you guys from? Matthias: Japan, I think.
• Lizzy: you're very slow at running mom. (She's right.)
• Matthias: I am the PhD destroyer driod.
• Me: Matthias do you know what it means to be adopted? Matthias: That I'm pregnant?
• We were discussing the types of qualities Lizzy should look for in a future spouse (e.g., kind, handsome, temple worthy) and she quickly added, 'and a tickle man.'
• While waiting in the car pool lane for Matthias after school, Lizzy said, I think he's locked in the dungeon.
• Lizzy: We can feel Jesus in our hearts. Then she rubbed her rib cage and said, I feel His head.
• Matthias told me that if he practiced singing a song for 3 million and 5 days he would be the most awesomester.
• Lizzy (while crying): Matthias always says the prayer!
• Mom: What does daddy study for work. Matthias: Farts, I think.
• Lizzy singing: "with cheese and holiness."
• Matthias was choosing a candy. When choosing a sucker he said, "I'm really good at sucking."
• Dad: What do you want to be when you grow up? Lizzy: I want to be Rapunzel. Dad: And what will you do? Lizzy: I will let down my hair for my mommy!
• Lizzy: Matthias, when you grow up you will like tacos. This is very important.
• Lizzy: It's Septober!
• Lizzy: we don't eat sunsets.
• Walking into to the zoo to see the flamingos, Lizzy said, "I can smell the foul mango juice."
• After making a "person" with k'nex, Lizzy was describing it and pointed to a piece and said, "this is a big red neck."
• Lizzy: they will go under the water. They will melt into solid ice because that's what water does.
• Matthias: I don't know where I got this owie. Maybe I'm just getting old.
• Matthias: I like beans because I like to fart.
• Lizzy: I'm reading the scriptures. 'And behold, Nephi did a lot of stuff and he remembered it. And one guy got put in the dungeon. True love saved the Nephites.'
• Lizzy: I want to be elsa when I grow up so that I can fix the exercise stuff at the Glenn lake park. But I need someone to drive me to the park because I don't know how to drive.
• Matthias (pointing to Howie Mandel on AGT): He looks like an alien, right mom? Because he doesn't have any hair.
• Lizzy: did you fart from your mouth? Matthias: no I'm singing the song from Harry Potter.
• Me (Cheryl): Matthias, why are you making that noise. Lizzy: because he's an alien.
• Lizzy: Jesus likes pizza. I will tell him that when I'm dead.
• After smashing a caterpillar and watching it ooze out, Matthias said, that made my tummy sick.
• Matthias singing to himself: king of the muscles, king of the muscles.
• Lizzy: no mom, don't feed me like a cow.
• Matthias: I love colored pencils. I was waiting years and years for colored pencils.
• Lizzy: only grown ups can drive because my butt isn't big enough yet.
• Matthias everyday: this is the best day ever.
• Lizzy: we don't say caught, we say catched
• We were talking about Lizzy possibly attending Matthias' old preschool. Matthias, as the concerned older brother, turned to Lizzy and asked, "Lizzy, do you like fun? Because my old school was fun." Lizzy responded, "Yes, I do." Matthias was relieved and say "PHEW!"
• Lizzy is learning about butterflies in school. I (Cheryl) told her that Poppa Paul taught me to call the white butterflies "Charlie." She responded by saying that she calls her butterflies "Grandpa Garn, Stinky, and Peach Stew."
• Matthias likes to tell jokes now. "Why did the CD take a bath? Because it had a clean up song."
• The other day Lizzy said, "Speaking of snow, when can we go to the beach?"
• After learning how to pump on the swing, Matthias said, "Now I know everything."
• After the snow was melting from our second big snow storm Lizzy said, "We should get some more snow. PINK SNOW!"
• Matthias: "Mom, where is Africa?" I (Cheryl pulled out a map and showed him). Matthias enthusiastically responds, "Oh, I will swim there in one day and go to Kenya and see Daddy!"
• On her pretend phone Lizzy said, "Hi grandma! Are you in China? Oh you are. I'm good. I love you. Okay, bye!"
• Lizzy told me (Cheryl) at church, "My shoes are tired."
• Matthias: "I want to be a builder." Cheryl: "What will you build?" Matthias: "I will build a toy store. It will have only boy toys. If you are a boy, come on in. Then I will build a girl toy store really far away by Grandma Lewis."
• In response to a request Matthias said, "Ay ay, Captain mom."
• On the way to school, Lizzy told me (Cheryl), "Good job, old lady."
• Matthias: "I only like my nickname sometimes." Cheryl: "When?" Matthias: "On Thursdays, Sundays, and snowy days."
• After breakfast (on the Saturday after Halloween) Lizzy exclaimed that she was done eating. After I (Cheryl) asked what she should do next, she responded, "I will clear my place, get my treat, and EAT IT!"
• Lizzy was dancing in the front room: "I spin because I'm a princess." Matthias responded, "I'm a prince, so I wiggle."
• Lizzy got a whistle with her halloween candy from school and before blowing it said, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I will huff, I will huff, I will huff!" *whistle sound* "I did it, mom! I blew the house down!"
• Matthias has been learning about bones at school. He pushed on his tummy and said that it was squishy. I (Cheryl) told him there were no bones right there, just organs and tissue. He said, "Tissue like you wipe your nose and your bum?"
• I (Cheryl) was trying to help Matthias see some small fish in a little stream. He responded by saying, "No, but good try mom."
• Matthias' friend at school moved to Colorado, but Matthias told us that he moved to El Dorado.
• After taking off her shoes in the car, Lizzy announced, "I will walk in the bear hut." (Meaning she will walk in bear foot.)
• Josh taught the kids how to sing 'you are my sunshine.' They have made up their own versions. Lizzy: "Please don't take my marshmallow candy away." Matthias: "Please don't take my moonshine away."
• Lizzy likes to sing on the way home from school. One day she came up with this little ditty, "I like my mommy, I like my mommy. I like my daddy, it's true. I like my mommy and daddy. Com back mommy and daddy. You give me kisses. And Grandma Lewis will fix my bracelet."
• Matthias knows how to melt my heart. He told me (Cheryl), "Mom, you are the sweet mom."
• While boating Matthias had been telling everyone that they were amazing. When I (Cheryl) got back on the boat after waterskiing he told me I was good. Then he added, "You fell down mom, that was not amazing."
• Josh was copying Lizzy while she was crying. She immediately told him, "Stop crying, dad!"
• Lizzy was randomly walking around singing, "My head is big, my head is big."
• Clearly understanding gender, Matthias said, "I have red car shoes, that's why I'm a boy."
• After quiet time, Matthias said "now it's louder time!"
• Matthias was mad after a lego truck fell and broke and exclaimed, "What the super heck!"
• Lizzy likes to refer to all girls and princesses and all boys and princes. Matthias corrected her and said that he is not a prince, he's a good monster. Lizzy responded by saying "I'm a scary monster. RAWR!"
• Lizzy saw a friend from church. Referring to this boy she smiled and said, "My boyfriend is my Lincoln."
• Wise words from Matthias: "Heavenly Father said not to pick your nose."
• Matthias is missing his grandparents. He told me that "we need to go to the airplane house to get airplane money and go on the airplane." I'm glad someone has that all figured out.
• On a Monday evening, Matthias told us he wanted "Family home evening wrestling time."
• I was showing Matthias were his grandpas and daddy served their missions. Matthias is thoughtful and then says, "Where's Matthias' mission?" I asked him to show me. "Right here, in the big green one," he said while pointing to the middle of Russia.
• We noted that we used kind words so that we can be nice to people and be like Jesus. Lizzy quickly responded, "no, you're kidding me."
• During FHE, we asked Matthias what kinds words he could say to daddy. He thought about it, then said, "Daddy, you're not a bad guy."
• Lizzy happily exclaimed, "I have feet!" Mommy respond, "that's true, how many do you have?" Lizzy wasn't sure, so quickly counted, "1, 2, 3!"
• The best way to get the kids up the stairs for bed time is to have a race. Matthias made it to the top of the stairs first, so I (Cheryl) said, "Matthias won!" Lizzy responded, "No, Lizzy one. Matthias is three." Good point.
• Lizzy was trying to say her full name today. It came out "Elizabeth Josh Garn."
• While saying her prayers Lizzy said, "Thanks for mommy, daddy, Matthias, and a princess!"
• While looking quizzically through his binocular hands, Matthias said, "I don't see the chairs moving; they don't have legs."